February Weigh In & Goals

January Weight: 263 lbs

February Weight: 260 lbs

Monthly Loss: -3 lbs

Total Weight Lost: 35 lbs

Total Inches Lost: 24.5

January started out pretty well! I got down to 257 lbs and was posting my weekly weight on my Instagram account. Then for some strange reason, I just stopped. Like I told you all before, I suffer from seasonal depression and sometimes I just mentally shut down. It's like this alter-ego comes in and takes over my brain and I just don't care. About anything.

I had Friday off this week, and I was down. Depressed. Sad for no reason. I had some things to do in the morning, but after that I basically turned into a zombie. I drove around town and stopped at a few stores, feeling like I was completely alone in the world (even though I took Eli to lunch, and we had a great time.) I finally stopped at Macey's and bought a giant bag of chocolate covered cinnamon bears, then stopped at KFC and got a large popcorn chicken (even though I had eaten a chicken sandwich like 1.5 hours prior to that.) I took them home and ate the chicken while watching Grey's Anatomy, and also managed to throw half the cinnamon bears down. I felt even more disgusting afterward, but I just didn't care. 

I am not telling you these things for you to feel sorry for me, or think I am a slob, or judge me. I am telling you because, more than likely, some of you suffer from this same disease. Some of you can probably relate to this exact scenario. Depression is real, and hard!

So where do we go from here? The answer is so different for every single person that suffers from it, and I wish that my plan worked for everyone. 

Luckily that night I came home, looked on Facebook and saw and ad for Weight Watchers. I was a very happy member of WW last year, and actually lost the majority of my weight so far while on the plan. I don't know why I decided to ruin a good thing because from the moment I cancelled my membership, losing became almost impossible. My Fitness Pal is an amazing free app, but it just doesn't cut it for me, There is something that happens in my brain when using the Points Plus program; it yields such greater results for me. They have a wonderful support group and hundreds of challenges to compete in, which help me stay motivated and focused! 

I joined Friday night again, and haven't looked back! I am excited about eating healthy; I have also made some new weight loss goals for the next 6 months! Everything just fits right now.

I struggled with my phone goals for January. I didn't engage as much as I wanted to, and I looked at my phone too much. For February and March I am going to do something a little different. 

 I want to become a morning person. My morning usually consists of me taking Eli to work, coming home and getting back into bed, and sleeping again until about 30 minutes before work. I then  jump in the shower and get ready so fast that I don't even get breakfast in. I want this to change! I want to wake up and get a workout in. Exercise in the morning gives me so much energy. I also want to make a healthy breakfast to sustain me through the morning. I feel that if I can get into this routine, things will change for the better in my life! 

I am choosing to take this goal seriously, so that is why it is a 2 month goal for me. I really want to make this into a habit that will eventually turn into second nature for me.

I know I have made many empty promises these last few months, but I am so grateful for all of your support through my journey. Thanks for not giving up on me! 

We can do hard things!  

Anniversary Weekend: Good Time, Bad Choices.

These past 2 weeks have been a whirlwind of crazy, especially with our 3 year anniversary last Tuesday. We took 5 days off and just enjoyed ourselves!

Us over the years.

We were able to go on a Haunted Ghost Tour in our little town, go to a Pumpkin Patch followed by shopping and dinner out with my sister, and a bunch of other fun things! It was such a nice feeling to just be together without an agenda.

We got to pick them off of the vine!

Carving our spoils!

We also spent some time in the mountains at our favorite spot on our actual anniversary, which was so therapeutic to our souls! We both find so much solace in nature, it energizes us and helps us to unwind and remember what the true meaning of this crazy life is.

Like I said, the weekend was amazing. I, however, didn't stick to my plan very well. Life is all about trial and error, and this weekend was an error in the wellness aspect of things. We ate out at least once a day, and I just didn't make good choices. I also didn't exercise. You may think I have no willpower, but that simply isn't true. I made a choice to disregard my plan, and in retrospect I am glad I did for one reason. I never will do it again. I felt like literal garbage. I was sluggish and moody, and my mind was so fuzzy! I didn't want to do anything or go anywhere...I just wanted to be a vegetable. This right here is proof that what you put into your mouth has a major effect on your body AND mind.

I remember reading a post on one of my favorite fellow weight loss blogs about how a little way into her journey they went to Disneyland as a family. She let herself eat whatever she wanted, but then when she returned home she realized that she missed eating healthy and exercising. It was something that had become a part of who she was and is today. I feel that this happened to me as well. I couldn't wait to get back on track when we had to come back to reality, and although it has been hard, I'm grateful that I have been unwilling to give up. I know by next week life will be back to normal, and my cravings will have subsided.

Here are a few of my recent Instagram posts. I may have had a rough week, but I am still making progress. The first one is two photos that have been layered together so that you can see my literal progress. It's a little tough to see, but you get the idea. The dark area inside is what I look like now in this shirt.

Up next is a comparison. I am just happy to see that although I weigh the exact same in these two photos, as I am losing weight I am tightening and toning up. Even the same clothes fit very differently because we have been lifting heavy weights and really building muscle when we work out. The left one was taken on our honeymoon, and the right one was taken on our anniversary this week.

This next one is just a comparison from last years family photo to this year. I can see quite a difference.

The final one is what I am most proud of! Although I don't have a photo of me last year wearing this coat, anyone who knows me can confirm that I could barely even zip it up! It was so tight that you could see my stomach and sides bulging out. I decided to put it on just to see how it fit last Friday, and lo and behold:

It's huge on me! I can actually see all the way through it down to the ground when I look inside. I was completely in awe! It's almost too big to wear and feel comfortable in at this point..I don't want to look frumpy!

Finding the sparkle in life and the silver lining through difficult times is the only way for me to press forward! This journey is real and it will lead me to a healthy, happy place if I can just trust the process. As my dad has always said, "slow is your friend!" I never thought that a silly phrase in reference to driving through Sardine Canyon during snow storms would mean so much to me now. It has honestly become a mantra to me during this lifestyle change. My point being, find what works for you. Find your own words of wisdom and repeat them often!

We can definitely do hard things!

Sugar Free Zucchini Muffins

Last week I was given two GIANT zucchinis. I am talking 4 cups shredded, each! So I decided to do what any good neighbor should and make some zucchini bread. Since I was making it for a family friend, I didn't want to experiment too much with artificial sweeteners, so I found a delicious sounding recipe on Pinterest. Let me tell you something...that was the best zucchini bread I have ever eaten. It made two loaves, so I naturally had to keep one and taste it. Within 3 days I had eaten the entire loaf. I think Eli ate one piece, but he isn't into sweet treats. 

I didn't realize at the time what happens to you when you go off of the sugar and then decide to dabble a little...especially as a diabetic. That loaf had one whole cup of sugar and another cup of oil in it. Needless to say, I got sick. Not sick in a normal way; sick in a disgusting, bloated, grumpy, negative, pile-of-garbage way. It was about the worst week I've had since my first week off the sugar back in March. I was miserable and mean and short-tempered and nauseous and just horrid!

Long story short, the next giant zucchini was going to go bad today. So this time, I adapted my recipe and tweaked it and managed to get some delicious muffins without the guilt!

Zucchini Muffins

3 cups zucchini, finely grated
3 cups wheat flour or white flour
2/3 cup unsweetened apple sauce
1/3 cup oil ( to keep the muffins light and fluffy)
2 eggs, beaten
1/2 cup + 2 Tablespoons + 2 teaspoons Truvia for Baking*
1 Tablespoon vanilla
2 teaspoons baking soda
3 teaspoons cinnamon
pinch of salt
Walnuts or Pecans (optional)

 Combine all ingredients in a large mixing bowl. No need to use a mixer. Liberally spray a muffin tin with canola oil. Fill each cup to the top and bake the muffins @ 350 degrees for 20-25 minutes until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.

This recipe should make between 15-20 muffins,depending on the size of your cups.

*You can substitute Truvia for 1 1/3 cup Splenda for Baking if you wish.

I hope you love these as much as I do! They ring in at 3 WW points each, which isn't bad for how hearty and large they are! :